Life...Yeah ;)

Ok so all the fans out there (all 4 of you) have been begging me to update my blog. All right here it is!!
So I am on vacation and it has been amazing- cheesecake for breakfast, 30 Rock marathons, not wearing make up, and lots of family time!!! I am in a reflective mood, so be prepared for a serious-ish post.  My dad passed away two years ago this March, and today was the first time I have been able to watch home videos of him. I was extremely hesistant-he meant the world to me and even talking about him gets me emotional. I guess I was afraid that seeing him would make me come undone, that all of the grieving and accepting I've done would be erased. But I so desperatley wanted to hear his voice again,so I went for it! For about an hour my sister and I bawled and laughed and watched, fixated on finding any trace of my dad. It was so nice to hear his voice, and for a few seconds it was nice to escape and go back to a time when he was with us.  I wont lie- my heart ached for a few hours after and it has been sort of a hard day. But watching was so worth it- I am getting to a point where instead of being sad I am appreciating my time with my dad. I am so lucky for the family and friends that have helped me through this. I am so glad for the million tiny surprises and joys in life to look forward to. Ok very, very cheesy, but true!!!!  Before this sounds anymore like an excerpt from Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul, or JD at the end of a Scrubs episode, Merry Christmas!!!! -L